Ferrandi Paris Diary: week 3 recap.

Week 3 at Ferrandi Paris was very interesting, to say the least, and came with a lot of challenges. This was entremet and petit gâteaux week. Entremets and petit gâteaux are cakes and desserts typically composed of multiple components, these can include, but arent limited to things like mousse, praline, sponge, compote, and more.

This week we were given ten recipes to pick from and focus on, I picked the Forêt Noire, (black forest), because it's one of mum's favourites and I was feeling nostalgic, maybe even a little homesick when, deciding what to make.

Now, for reasons I'll delve into, I won't be naming the chef who taught this week. I was left feeling quite dejected and unsatisfied by weeks end, and in my goal to openly share everything, I need to be honest about the course and experience each week. So, lets dive into the issues this week presented and how I dealt with feelings of inadequacy and imposter syndrome.

From the jump, things were rocky. Our chef this week wasn't as fluent in english as our usual chef for the program. We were given our recipes, formulated incorrectly and entirely in French. Now, don't get me wrong, translating a recipe from french to english can be incredibly helpful in learning the appropriate workplace language. But when you have an "international" class with students from all over the globe, many of whom don't speak a word of French, it speaks to disorganisation and lack of preparation. Given the time and money invested into attending this course, I personally found that quite frustrating.

Due to the slight language barrier and poorly structured recipes, when we finally did start preparing our recipes, chaos erupted in the lab. For example, none of the recipes had the correct quantities of each component, forcing us to make the same recipe multiple times when one scaled up version would have sufficed. I had to ask about the layering of my dessert 5 times, and still got it wrong. Not only that but recipes for items like decorations (like the cherries you see on my Forêt Noire) weren't listed at all. Meaning if I forgot a component or didn't have enough, tough luck.

All these issues, and more, culminated in feelings of inadequacy. I started questioning myself and my decision to come study in Paris. Was I just not capable of understanding or seeing the chef's vision? Was I not good enough to get there? Was I the problem?

But this is where I have to say, no.

As culinary professionals we can often get stuck in a mentality of comparing ourselves to others, striving to be better, striving for more but for all the wrong reasons, chasing someone elses idea of success. Something I've had to overcome working in this industry, is feeling like an imposter, wondering if I really belong in a kitchen, or if I have the resilience to keep going. I think many of us can relate to that. and I have to remind myself; I have put in the time, I do have the skills, knowledge and talent to carve out my own place and definition of success in the industry.

So, to combat this mentality, I've found that taking a step back, analysing the situation and reconnecting with my core beliefs and faith in myself helps tremendously. By the end of the week, when I was feeling overwhelmed, I took that step back and came to these conclusions:

When it comes to education, there is no one way to learn or teach. We're not always going to gel and understand every instructor. Personally, I'm a hands on, visual learner, so the lack of demonstrations or visual aids this week threw a wrench in the works for me. But that's not a personal failing. If you're doing all you can to learn and still aren't absorbing anything new, maybe it's up to the teacher to change their approach.

When it comes to your inner thoughts and monologue, you have to maintain that positivity. I know its hard. But look at the facts: I've been working in this industry since I was 13. That's over a decade of experience, and thats no small feat. I got accepted into culinary school, in Paris! I came all the way from Darwin, 24 hours of flying and 2 layovers away. That means Something. Everyone is learning, all the time. And if you ever feel like you aren't doing enough or aren't where you want to be yet, remember that. Remember how far you've already come, and how much further you're going to go.

With all that said, our class brought these issues to the school's attention, and they have addressed them by offering us an additional week of training with a Michelin starred chef, who will be teaching us entremets and petit gâteaux.

Thanks for tuning in, coming up next: Les Jardins Château de Versailles.

Until next time, from Willoh.